By Robby
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Related blog post: 6 Types of Foreign English Speakers: Which One Are YOU?
VIDEO TRANSCRIPT BELOW:
Hi guys and welcome back to Robby’s English Harmony video blog!
In today’s video, I’m going to draw your attention to the fact that not all native English speakers are the same. So basically, speaking with one person might actually be completely different from speaking with some other person and more often than not, it is the case.
Basically, all people are not the same and here’s an example so that you can actually understand better what exactly I’m talking about, right? I’m doing the PC course in the college currently and there’s a guy whose mind is constantly wandering when he speaks. He just – I’m under the impression that he actually finds it very difficult to stay on the same topic for some reason or another!
Speaker Type #1: Subject Changer
He would, say for example, pass by and then he would start a conversation about something. At the moment I start responding to whatever it is he’s saying, he interrupts me with something completely unrelated and when it happened for the first few times, I was a bit shocked.
I thought that he probably doesn’t get what I’m saying as a response, but then, in the end, it turns out that he speaks the same way with everyone else!
So what I’m doing now is I’m actually – I’m making the point of staying on the same topic. So for example, if he interrupts me by saying something unrelated, I would still keep talking whatever I started saying, right? Which forces him to get back onto the original subject and finish the conversation in a normal manner.
Sometimes I kind of feel bad about it, but I shouldn’t be because if I allow him to change the topic every few seconds, the conversation is just impossible and I get all confused and eventually after a few minutes, I don’t know what’s going on – I can’t understand what exactly it is that we were talking about.
So if you encounter people like that, don’t be ashamed of taking the initiative and actually a little bit ignoring the other person, what they’re saying, if it’s completely unrelated to the original subject.
Obviously, every conversation is different. I’m not telling you that you should be completely ignorant of what the other person says, but it’s just that if you encounter a person like that who changes topics every few seconds, you don’t have to feel embarrassed of maintaining the course, so to speak, and keep talking about the original subject.
At least finish off what you were saying, OK? And then there’s a different type of person, someone who just won’t listen to you!
Speaker Type #2: The Ignorant One
He’s engaged in a conversation with you, but it’s rather a monologue than a dialogue. Basically, he’s talking and you’re trying to say something as a response or just put in your five cents, but he just ignores you.
He just keeps blabbing on about whatever he has on his mind. So in this particular situation, all you can do is just listen to that person, say something, if you feel like it, and if that person doesn’t actually consider what you were saying, but just keeps going on about whatever he was saying, just let him do so – don’t take it personally, because it’s just the type of personality that that person possesses and, obviously, they can’t help it, right?
Speaker Type #3: The Awkward One
And then there’s another type of person who would find very difficult to start a conversation and then that puts you in a very awkward position as well, because you have to take the initiative to say something, right?
And I can actually picture that guy a couple days when we ended up just the two of us standing outside. He was having a cigarette and he wouldn’t say anything. I mean, it’s not that he would be unfriendly – I know for a fact that he’s quite friendly in a crowd, right?
In a group conversation, it’s actually quite easy to communicate with him because there’s always something that someone else says and then that person, that guy, chimes in by saying something and I always actually find it easy to respond to that comment, right?
And again, you don’t have to feel embarrassed. You don’t have to feel awkward. That’s how I felt in the beginning, but now I just enjoy the moment of silence. I would say something, probably make a comment about the weather, “Back to rain again,” because lately our weather’s been really bad, right?
We were promised a heat wave a couple of weeks ago but we only had two or three days of really good weather and then it all went back to normal, as Irish people say, because typical Irish weather is overcast, occasional showers and sometimes it rains all-day long, nonstop, right?
So I would probably make a comment about the weather, say something about the class, whatever happened in the class a few minutes ago, right?
Because normally we would be taking fifteen-minute breaks every ninety minutes or so, so we would walk outside and probably discuss something that happened in the class or whatever, but all I’m saying is you don’t have to feel awkward just because that person is not saying anything and you can’t think of anything to say.
Just calm down, relax, and say something even though it might sound very simplistic, very trivial, just like I told you – the weather comment is probably what people say every day, a hundred times a day, but still it doesn’t hurt to say something just to break the ice, just to maybe get the conversation going, if you know what I mean.
But even if that person doesn’t respond with anything meaningful, so be it, right?
It’s just the type of person he is, or she is for that matter, and basically the message I wanted to convey in this video to you guys is that there are many different types of English speakers out there.
Yes, there are those who you would find very easy to communicate with, who would ask you questions, respond to what you’re saying, be very friendly and wouldn’t mind you asking them, “Can you say it again?” if you, probably, didn’t get what they were saying and they would actually ask you, “Can you say it again?” if they didn’t understand what you were saying.
So that would be a normal two-way conversation.
But there are exceptions to the rule, as always, and there are, just like I told you in this video previously, there are different types of people who you would probably find a little bit harder to communicate with, right?
But the general rule is don’t feel pressured, don’t feel embarrassed for that particular situation. Just play it by ear, which means improvise. See how the situation develops and basically don’t allow the other person to make you feel embarrassed or stressed out or make you feel incompetent, right?
If you’re saying something and they just don’t listen to you, don’t take it personally; just think to yourself, “Whatever. He’s not listening to me, it’s his problem,” right? And the conversation is just not there, just like I told you, don’t feel under pressure to just say something just to get the conversation going.
If the other person doesn’t want to talk to you, for whatever reason, let it be, you know?
So yeah. That’s about it!
That’s the message I wanted to send to you, my friends, today. And if you have any questions in relation to this video or English improvement in general, please feel free to ask them in the comments section below.
Thanks for watching and chat to you soon! Bye bye!
Robby
P.S. Would you like to find out why I’m highlighting some of the text in red? Read this article and you’ll learn why it’s so important to learn idiomatic expressions and how it will help you to improve your spoken English!
P.S.S. Are you serious about your spoken English improvement? Check out my English Harmony System HERE!
P.S. Are you serious about your spoken English improvement? Check out the English Harmony System HERE!